You are probably better off booking a room at a small hotel/motel. They are used to rowdy crowds. They may have a a kitchen, or you could get it catered.
In restaurants you would be near other diners and probably disrupt them. Stick with a hotel.What is a good restaurant in DC for private dining (details provided)?
Most restaurants have private dining areas, or have spaces that can walled off with sliding panels. I don't know what kind of food you are thinking of, or how many people you have in mind, but it definitely can be done. So just ask any restaurant you like whether they can give you a private room. You'd be surprised how many of them are very happy to do something like that.
Unless your party is going to be very large, I do not agree that a hotel is a better choice. I have run parties both in restaurants and in hotel spaces, and for any gathering up to about 75 or 100, restaurants offer better arrangements. You have much more menu flexibility, and you do not have to pay extra for the plates and flatware. More importantly, the hotel caterers will try to get you to go with one of their set menus, which may not be what you want. Hotels work great for big affairs, but otherwise you are better off at a restaurant.
However, if you don't go to a restaurant, consider renting a party room at a church or a place like VFW, Knights of Columbus, Elks lodge, American Legion hall, or similar place. Then, you can have a restaurant cater in the food. That would give you all the privacy you want, and the price is going to be a lot less. You may even be able to use a community center. In Montgomery County, for example, you can rent a room with a kitchen attached that would work perfectly for something like you are planning. I went to a very nice adult birthday party--with music, food and everything--and it was great. It was also very inexpensive, because they brought their own drinks and just catered in the food.
Good luck, and I hope this helps.
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